By Audrey Liebross

Broadway Jack-of-All-Trades Seth Rudetsky Entertained a Crowd at the Rancho Mirage Public Library

The Rancho Mirage Writers Festival Writers series, part of the Rancho Mirage Writers Fest, recently presented a talk by hilarious Broadway guru Seth Rudetsky, at the Rancho Mirage Library and Observatory. The talk, which discussed Seth’s book MUSICAL THEATRE FOR DUMMIES (copies of which the first 200 guests received at no cost), was more of a series of uproarious anecdotes told in Seth’s inimitable style. (Disclosure: Seth’s dad and stepmom live in Palm Desert and are friends of mine).

Seth is a show biz expert who wrote comedy for the Rosie O’Donnell Show, played keyboard for more than a dozen Broadway musicals (among them Ragtime, Les Miz,  and The Phantom of the Opera), acted on Broadway in The Ritz, and co-wrote and starred in Disaster! on Broadway. He currently hosts Sirius/XM Satellite Radio’s On Broadway and Seth Speaks!, as well writing a weekly column for Playbill.com. Seth currently tours the country doing master classes and performing his one-man show Deconstructing Broadway. He also run’s Seth’s Big Fat Broadway Vacations, hosting tour groups on cruise ships. Did I mention that Seth is a gifted raconteur whose rapid speech betrays his New York roots?

With a resume like Seth’s, it is no wonder that he has lots of Broadway stories to tell in his book. And, in a few cases, he named names during the talk, although never in embarrassing contexts. (Seth and his husband, James Wesley, whom I met on their recent Broadway cruise to Alaska, are both VERY nice guys.) Seth, who told the library audience, “I love mishap stories,” proceeded to relay one about Lucille Ball, whose daughter, Lucie Arnaz, was in the audience for Seth’s talk.

Ms. Ball was starring in Wildcat in 1960, her only Broadway show. One of her co-stars had a dog who usually stayed in the co-star’s dressing room during performances, but one day decided to go exploring. The dog wandered out on stage and concluded that this was an excellent place to, um, poop. The next scene was a dance number with the dancers wearing long white dresses, and a further mishap was bound to occur. Ms. Ball, clearly a quick thinker, ran for cleaning supplies and, apparently in full view of the audience, got rid of the mess. At that point, she turned to the audience and cracked, “I should have read my contract better.”

While there were plenty of laughs during Seth’s talk, it was also educational. For example, Seth explained the differences among the three types of covering performers. (A standby only goes on for one or two leading roles; an understudy is a member of the ensemble or performer in another role who subs for a larger role; and a swing learns all the ensemble parts, including the dancing, and goes on for any missing ensemble member). The stage manager leads rehearsals for the substitute performers, but not for substitute musicians — those individuals are expected to learn their parts individually, and to be ready to go on without rehearsals.

Seth spent fifteen years as a substitute keyboardist in my favorite musical of all time, The Phantom of the Opera. He told a story about a mishap while he was in the Majestic Theater’s pit: At one point, the Phantom’s mask bounced into the pit next to Seth’s keyboard. He put it on not realizing that the masks were specifically made to fit the performer playing the role and could become misshapen if someone else wore it. His joke stretched the mask out, resulting in some very angry costume and makeup people. But that piece of hijinks was minor compared to one he described by truly diabolical swings during Audra McDonald’s last performance in Ragtime. Specifically, the swings placed beepers in the coffin in which her dead character reposes. The pranksters telephoned the beepers while Ms. McDonald was onstage in the coffin, meaning that she had to lie perfectly still while getting zapped the entire time.

For those who missed the talk, it is available to view on the Writers Festival Web site, www.rmwritersfest.org/videos/writers-series. The library’s list of upcoming author talks can be viewed at www.ranchomiragelibrary.org. Seth Rudetsky’s Web site is www.SethRudetsky.com .  Seth will perform nearby with former Phantom and Les Miz villain Javert Norm Lewis, on Friday, December 1, 2023, at the Webb Center for the Performing Arts in Wickenburg, Arizona. In addition, he will appear at the Segerstrom Center’s Samueli Theater, with Lillias White, from May 16-18, 2024.